Embracing Change
Written December 2021
Rejection equals Redirection
A year ago, I thought I knew what I was passionate about. I thought that I had a passion for rowing and racing as a coxswain, in a boat, with rowers. I wanted to be the best in the world. I’d already committed three summers of my undergraduate life to compete for a spot on the Under 23 National Team. A decision I made to commit myself to my passion, in hopes of achieving a once in a lifetime goal. I wanted to go to the Olympics and train with the senior national team. At that point in time, I knew I could do it, I knew that if I approached U23 selection camp correctly and got to race in the 2021 world championships, this could be a real future for myself. I saw it in my life trajectory, and I felt competent in the reality of this goal because the people around me encouraged me to pursue this path for myself. But this is not what happened. Things did not turn out to be in my favor when vying for a spot on the national team. As heartbreaking that this experience turned out to be, it allowed me to see my future in a new perspective.
At the end of the day, I achieved something for myself that I didn’t think was possible to begin with, which was making it to selection camp in the first place (coming from a DII program at the time), three times on top of that. And I am honored to be able to represent UC San Diego Athletics on a national level and as a female athlete. I truly value the connections I’ve made with some of the most impressive athletes and amazing people I’ve met during my summers training.
I realized that neither my skillsets nor my passions are limited to my existence and role on a rowing team— which is dependent on the specific atmosphere of coaches and rowers, and boats and oars. In truth, this is where my passion stemmed from—from my love of the sport of rowing, the team dynamic and culture, and being on the water with my teammates— but my potential as a human extends far beyond this environment.
These experiences have allowed me to come to terms with the fact that coxing, for me, is just part of a sport that I love. It allowed me to see my value and my impact beyond the boat—being able to extend my leadership skills, passionate about helping people solve problems, develop the best solutions, come up with new ways of thinking and communicating, and helping people achieve more than they thought they’d be able to.